Trying out soccer

We signed Avery up for soccer over the summer, and she just had her third practice tonight. Her first game is next Saturday, and well...we are definitely beginners! For this being her very first experience with soccer, she's doing pretty well! She hasn't totally grasped the concept that she can't touch the ball with her hands, but she's getting there! Practice lasts 30 minutes, and the coach calls it an 'epic success' if all the kids stay on the field at the same time :) It's funny to see kids 2.5-4 yrs 'play soccer'. Oh boy...there's a lot of chaos, but man is it cute!

What I've learned

I feel as though I've learned a lot since becoming a mother of two. I know that there are moms out there with WAY more than two kids, but for me, it was an adjustment, and I knew it would be! I am someone who likes structure and order. The unknown can be scary for me, especially when I don't have control over it. I was very anxious about 2013! I knew adding another child to the family would mean lots of change, but I didn't fully understand it until it really happened. Although there are lots of days when I feel frazzled and scattered, I absolutely L.O.V.E. being a mother to my two little ladies!

Over the last (almost) 6 months, I have learned a lot since becoming a mother of two. These are the ones that stick out the most:

* It's ok to say no. I have found this to be incredibly important! It's ok to put your kids and family before other people's schedules and plans. Sometimes a mom just has to say, 'No, that won't work for us. We will try for another time.'

* Multiple times a day, someone is being neglected. And that's ok! They're not going to die if their need(s) are not met that very second. Unless it's going on the potty or a safety matter, most things Avery wants/needs can wait a few minutes or even hours. Same with Lucy!

* Moms do things differently, and that's fine. Judging others is ugly. I hate when I get the feeling people are judging me, and I hate the feeling even more I have when I know I've judged others.

* Treasure moments with your kids, Leah. Soak up the good and the bad...even the ugly! One day I'm going to wish my biggest problem was getting Lucy to nap!!

* Things DO get better! Those beginning few months with a toddler and a baby can be rough. Temper tantrums, newborn feeding/sleeping schedules are a mess, hormones are raging, and then add to the mix that at some point you need to shower and brush your teeth. I can say that things have gotten a lot better, and hygiene is where it should be :)

* You will mess up, and they will be ok. Don't be so hard on yourself. Kids are much more resilient then we give them credit for! Of course we need to listen to them, chat with them, love on them, and meet their emotional/physical needs BUT they bounce back pretty quick from injuries and hurt feelings.

I just keep learning. And I have a feeling the learning will go on, and on, and on!

 Lucy and Avery within the first month

Lucy and Avery at month 5

Perspective

The definition of perspective is how you see things. Having perspective is so important, whether it's in marriage, parenting, your job, or relationships! In my current stage of life in parenting, it is so easy to lose perspective on things, and just think this is how things will always be (sleepless nights, temper tantrums, etc.), but I know that isn't the case. I know that this is a stage of life, and it will end one day. In fact, I have a feeling I will really miss this stage one day. I will miss cuddling Lucy at 2am. I will miss the tearful I'm sorry's from Avery after she's been naughty. And one day, when they are yelling at me from their room after just being grounded, I'm going to wish my biggest problem was whether they took a good nap that day!

Perspective.


You're not able to get a Starbucks this week on your way to work because you're running late, and you're upset about it. There's a woman a few offices down who can't buy groceries this week. Perspective.

Your child has been on a good schedule for weeks, and all of a sudden has decided to stop taking an afternoon nap. There's a mom who just visited her sick child in the hospital.
Perspective.

You and your husband haven't had date night in a while because of a busy calendar. There's a couple down the street who are in the midst of  messy divorce and the kids are the ones paying for it.
Perspective.

 Sometimes I get in the rut of feeling sorry for myself when things aren't going well, or aren't going the way I want them to and then I always have to remind myself that this is a season, and all seasons end...even the good ones! Praise God that this life is not all we have! It's just a snap of a finger in the grand scheme of things.

A sweet reminder

Our friends Jen and Jack (and their two boys Evan and Liam) came to visit for 5 days and it was such a great visit! It was a sweet reminder of our past life in NY and the awesome friends we were blessed to grow up with, go through college with, the dating experience with and so on. We've lived down here for 8 years (actually John's been down here 9 years) and we have made awesome friends; people with whom we've gone through a lot with- the newlywed stage, the not so newlywed stage, our miscarriages, moving back and forth, job changes, and kids BUT spending a few days with old friends...was just really special! At one point when we were sitting in the living rook after all the kids were sleeping (finally!), I looked at everyone and said, "Guys...we're all grown up. We're like...adults!" We laughed a lot, enjoyed watching our kids play (and fight) together, and ate some good food over their visit. Until next time!

8 years with you

8 years with you, John and never a dull moment. Here are my top 8 memories/experiences with you since being married! (in no order of importance...)

1. Moving into our Newport News house and living with you for the first time. Since we never lived together before getting married, this was a HUGE experience for us! You carried me through the front door like such a gentleman!

2. Celebrating every holiday with you as a married couple! We are a team, and holidays are always better with your best buddy by your side.

3.  Going to Goodwill to buy furniture and decor for our house when we were newlyweds. We didn't have much money, but we did the best we could do with our finances at the time. (The furniture was hideous, but we didn't know it at the time.)

4. All the trips we took to Lowe's. It seems as though there is always a home improvement project going on at our house. In our first few months of marriage we did everything together, including running errands. I remember holding your hand as newlyweds walking up and down the isles of Lowe's...so in love!

5. Going to Europe with you. It was a business trip on paper, but we had more fun than most have on business trips! We ate lots of good food, drank good beer (you more than me), and saw tons of beautiful cities!

6. Sushi. We enjoy it more than any other meal. It's our celebration food!

7. Watching you become a dad for the first time. You were a natural. You made it look easy!

8. Watching you become a dad for the second time. You love our two girls in a protective, fun, adventurous, and generous way!

Cousins

Cousins are awesome, just ask Avery! She had a BLAST with Sam and Stella when they came for a visit! They flew home yesterday afternoon, and she has already asked about them a few times :( I didn't grow up seeing my cousins a lot because of the distance between us, and unfortunately it's looking the same way for Avery and Lucy. Instead of focusing on missing them, and being sad that it'll be months and months before we'll see them again, we are going to focus on how much fun Avery had with them, and talk to her about the fun things they did together and the nice memories they made.

The good, the bad, and the...

Since becoming a mother 2.5 years ago, I've learned a lot about myself. I've seen my strengths, but mostly my weaknesses at work. I wish I could say I was a perfect mom, I'd even settle for a mostly perfect mom, but I am far from that!

There are many days that I feel as though all I've done is double as a milking cow, wipe butts, and keep two little girls alive. Ok, the last one was a little dramatic, but it's true some days! I miss the days when I was just responsible for myself. What I would give to run errands on my OWN schedule without a screaming baby in the back, and a toddler who may or may not pee her panties in the middle of Target if I forget to rush her to the potty before we leave.

THE GOOD: I try my hardest to soak up sweet moments with my girls, and enjoy the day-to-day tasks. I love looking at them and think that their 'mine'! I get to enjoy watching them learn and grow each day instead of someone else doing the feeding, changing, and teaching! Being a stay at home mommy is a blessing, and I am so thankful for this time!

THE BAD: I get really impatient with them (especially Avery) when they act their age. How dare Lucy cry for no reason, and what is Avery thinking throwing a fit when she doesn't get her way?! (insert sarcasm) I snap easily some days, and don't show them how deeply I love them.

THE...: I have moments of 'What the +^%$# was I thinking having children??!!' I feel so incredibly inept, and the furthest thing from capable some days. I 'look' (aka read fb statuses that may or may not be an accurate portrayal of their lives...) at other mothers who seems to have it all together (and they have more kids than I do!), and wish I could have 1/18 the composure they do. I don't recognize my blessings on these days, and instead I play the victim. It's ugly.

I shared this with my small group the other night, and people were so encouraging! Everyone has 'suck' in their life, but thankfully we have a God who is SO SO SO SO SO much bigger than these pesky problems we face on Earth. Amen for that! Today I am going to live in His grace, because apart from that...well, my everyday would be THE BAD and THE ... moments.

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

~ 2 Corinthians 12:9